Running errands with kids can be challenging. When our kids are infants and toddlers, we pack those diaper bags full and head out to do our shopping, run our errands, and go to all those appointments. After a short couple of hours, we feel like our school-aged children must after a day of lugging around those book-laden backpacks. Between baby and bag, our neck is kinked, our shoulders are aching, and our backs and hips are just done.

Just like we can’t wait for the days we no longer have to change diapers, we look forward to the days we don’t have to lug around those diaper bags.

Mama, I’m here to tell you…

There are some things you will never stop taking with you when you are running errands with your kiddos in tow.

I call these The Essentials.

You never know what a day holds. Don’t venture out without proper preparation.

The Word of God

“Your word I have hidden in my heart,
That I might not sin against You.
I will meditate on Your precepts,
And contemplate Your ways.
I will delight myself in Your statutes;
I will not forget Your word” (Psalm 119:11, 15-16, NKJV).

When everything that could possibly go wrong in a day happens, you’ll find peace that passes all understanding and refreshment finer than that Starbucks cold brew in the Word of God.

When my kids were little, I traveled with my Bible in my purse or the diaper bag. I’m dating myself, but we didn’t have cell phones with Bible apps yet. Nowadays, I rely on YouVersion to keep the Word a swipe away.

Another reason to keep the Word with you? Kids ask all sorts of questions. God provides plenty of perfect answers. We just need to search the keywords and pull up the Scriptures. The older my kids get, the more I turn to the Bible in my responses. I have God’s Word hidden in my heart, but when I’m in the middle of trying to check out and the doctor’s office is on the phone and the little one is trying to grab candy bars while the middle child is asking serious life questions, I need a little help remembering the verses that are on the tip of my tongue.

You don’t even need to have the entire Bible with you. Check out this post for more ideas on how to carry God’s Word with you when you’re running errands.

Love, Patience, and Self-control

Hey Alycia, that’s three things.

You’re right.

I shop at Walmart. It’s a one-stop shop that has saved me a ton of precious time throughout my child-rearing days. I can buy my groceries, pick up new socks, and buy birthday party presents all at the same place.

I’m not sure why they call it the “terrible twos.” All of my kids didn’t hit “terrible” until they were three or four. And then it lasted until they were nine-ish. Let’s be honest. Most kids go through a bratty stage where you just want to lock them in their room until their attitude adjusts. It’s a time of learning in their lives. Learning that they can tie their shoes and blow their noses without Mom’s help. That they don’t need that piece of candy or that shiny new toy every time they pass it in the store.

It’s the time when every mother is tempted to throw a temper tantrum on aisle three to prove a point to the six-year-old who is screaming at the top of his lungs because Mom wouldn’t let him get the bag of snacks he begged for.

But there’s proving a point and losing control – and a BIG difference between the two.

Have you ever been running errands when a nearby mother totally snaps and lights into her kid in the middle of the store? I always feel bad for the kid.

Mama, you’re the adult.

If your patience is running frustration-stuck-in-your-throat-about-to-explode low, it’s time to punt on grocery shopping and head somewhere else. Home. To the park. To get ice cream. Somewhere other than the point of frustration.

Which is why I said we need to take along love, patience, and self-control.

Kids don’t know any better. Or maybe they do, and they just want to test the boundaries you’ve put in place. It’s what they do. And we, as Moms, should expect that. It shouldn’t surprise us. Nor should it trigger us.

When little Suzie is fussing, be proactive in love. Remind her that we don’t behave that way. Let her know that her actions (or reactions) will have consequences she won’t like.

Keep kindness on your tongue. Speak gently and use words that will affirm your love but not her behavior. You don’t want to react with spiteful words that will injure your child’s spirit. You don’t want to call Suzie a brat. You want to point out that her reaction to “No” or “Stop that” is unacceptable.

Maintain self-control. Most of us hate it when people stare at us for disciplining our children in public. Take Suzie out of the cart, grab your purse, and head for the car. Discipline her there. If she stops, go back to your cart (buggy, if you’re Southern) and finish shopping. If she doesn’t finish, take her home and put her down for a nap. Leave running errands for after your husband gets home and can keep the kids home while you shop in peace.

Which leads to number five.

Food and Drink

It’s Maslow’s Heirarchy of Needs 101.

Most of the time, kids act out because a basic need isn’t being met. If you’ve got younger kids, it’s likely they are hungry, thirsty, tired, or some combination of these. Taking your first grader grocery shopping for two hours after they’ve gotten out of a full day of school is not the wisest decision. It’s snack and unwind time.

After my youngest outgrew the need for a diaper bag’s worth of stuff, I continued to make certain I had snacks and drinks on hand if we were running errands for any length of time.

It’s okay to pop open a box of CapriSun or a bottle of water and a bag of Goldfish or a single-serve bag of Doritoes when Johnny gets hungry while you’re shopping. Just remember to scan them when you get to the register. Shoppers and workers alike will prefer Johnny’s content while you shop over him screaming through the store because he’s hungry and you’re too busy trying to finish running errands.

Don’t forget your sense of humor.

I know I turned bright red the day I took my three-year-old son with me to CVS, put him in the seat of the shopping cart, and proceeded to shop when he reached out and squeezed my boob while telling me the name of my body part loudly enough for everyone within three aisles of me to hear him.

Kids have no filter. They will say and do all sorts of crazy. All we can do as mothers is laugh with them.

One of my favorite things to read are Facebook posts from moms who share the things their kids say. Mama, you are not alone.

One thing that is not a laughing matter is running into a friend right after finishing your cup of Starbucks. Coffee breath is no laughing matter. Which is why it is also important to always have…

Gum or Breath Mints

When you’re sitting in church, shoulder-to-shoulder with the person next to you, and they offer you their Altoids tray, take the hint. Sure, they may have just popped on in their mouth and be making a friendly gesture. But the likelihood is that they are politely telling you that your breath stinks.

If you had your own breath mints or gum, they may not have had to share yours.

Second scenario: Your twelve-year-old daughter has beat her brothers to the front seat for the ride to school. She loves music, so she’s singing along with Adele. That’s when you realize she forgot to brush her teeth, so you crack the window just a bit, hoping the fresh air will blow away her bedtime breath. And you offer her the mint you wisely keep in your purse.

Alongside your…

Emergency Needs Bag

Mine is a blue makeup case that I think I’ve had since … college? (That’s a long time. I may need to consider getting a new one soon!)

Inside, I have:
Nail clippers, Nail file, Tweezers, Handi-wipe, Bandaids, Sanitary Supplies (one), Hand sanitizer, Lotion, Travel-sized deodorant, Lip balm, Eyeglass repair kit, Tylenol (acetaminophen), Advil (ibuprofen), Tums (or Rolaids – any antacid will do), Dramamine (for motion sickness), and Pamprin (for period pain).

(Okay. In this photo, my hand sanitizer and lotion are missing, because they’re in another pocket of my purse.)

My kids come down with headaches all the time when we’re out. With all the crazy flu and Coronavirus happenings, hand sanitizer is a must. My adopted daughter is always asking if I have my lotion with me. And I need it after washing my hands constantly, anyway. I’ve learned from experience that keeping the items listed above with me while running errands is a necessity.

So is entertainment.

When your child has read the same book or played with the same toy at the doctor’s office waiting room the last twenty times you’ve visited there, you’ll want a backup plan to keep them entertained while you wait your turn for your appointment.

When you have to make that three-hour shopping trip and have no one to watch your kid, having games on your phone can keep him entertained (and distracted from all those things he may otherwise beg for).

And when you’re waiting thirty minutes in car line for school to let out, it’s always nice to be able to read (or do one of these other twenty-nine things).

Finally, don’t forget your Resolve.

It’s really easy to give in to a kid who keeps asking for that Star Wars Lego set. Believe me, I know.

After taking four kids shopping with me every weekend for thirteen years, I realized they’d all have a college savings fund or enough to pay for their first apartment for an entire year if I hadn’t broken down and bought them a toy or treat every time we went to the store. Now, before you judge me, I didn’t buy them something every single time we went shopping.

Resolve is always a choice. Do you buy the toy or not? Do you go to the next store or not? Do you head home or take your chances with a screaming kid?

Believe it or not, your child has the superpower of manipulation. If you allow her to use it.

None of us wants to admit we let our kids call the shots. We want others to believe we have everything under control and that we make the decisions. Maybe you do. I congratulate you.

For those of us who tend to cave when we’re tired, frustrated, or just want a day without a struggle with our four year old, I promise you CAN do this. You can call the shots and have children who respond in a positive manner. Who understand that when you’re out shopping or attending school events or visiting the doctor’s office, they are to behave in socially acceptable manners.

You just need to take resolve with you when you walk out your front door. And lay down the law before you even open that door.

Mamas, motherhood requires preparedness. So take successful outings with your children. Make sure you don’t leave home without the essential things you need in order to enjoy your day and your time with your offspring.